Three and a half weeks out

By the time Saturday rolled around, I was exhausted and in a lot of pain. It is frustrating to me that the most simple, basic routine of the weekdays prior took so much out of me. It is what it is - but it is frustrating.

Things that are good for the soul when recuperating - friends. A good friend came up to visit and we just spent the afternoon and evening talking, and hanging out, and it was exactly what I needed.

So if you're wondering how to support a friend in the wake of something like this, know this - that no gesture, however small, goes unnoticed or unappreciated. Just a phone call or a note can brighten an afternoon when you are struggling - just knowing that you are in someone thoughts helps a great deal. Recovery is a long and arduous process, and it's when you are weeks out and still feeling like crap that you need those little things the most.

The worst thing you can do is to do nothing. A blogger I respect tremendously recently wrote,

Now, first of all, let me reiterate that when someone is going through Something Bad, the one thing worse than saying the wrong thing is to say nothing. Nature abhors a vacuum and so do friends ... if you say nothing, don't call, don't write, you create a vacuum. Chances are good that your friend will fill in the vacuum with their own thoughts, and they often (the DRE-BFF tells me) have no basis in reality. Thoughts like, "Oh, I guess I thought we were closer than we are," or "I guess I'm really self-involved and they don't want to have to listen to me," or "They think I need to just deal with it and get over it, don't they?"

LizardEater is the mother of a toddler who has been battling a rare type of cancer called Wilms' Tumor. She's well worth reading. Before my surgery, I was donating platelets in Little Warrior's name.

Friends are an vital part of any recovery process. Never doubt the worth of a few kind words.